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Wednesday, 11 November 2009

  • Faith: What Does It All Mean?

    What is faith really? So many Christians go about using this word "faith", but how many really know what it means? I'd say the most perfect chapter in the entire Holy Bible is Hebrews chapter 11. It explains PERFECTLY what faith truly is.

    Faith was only used TWICE in the Old Testament. It was used in Deuteronomy 32:20 and Habukkuk 2:4. In Deut., it was the Hebrew word "emuwn". It meant "established, trusty, trustworthiness, faith, faithful, truth". In Hab. it was the Hebrew word "emuwnah/emunah". That means "firmess, security, fidelity, faithful, set office, stability, steady, truly, truth, verily."

    It was used many, many times in the New Testament. When people were said to have "little faith", it was from the Greek word "oligopistos" which means "incredulous (i.e. lacking confidence (in Christ)". When it wasn't being to referred of "little faith" but just plain faith, it was the Greek word "pistis" which means "persuasion, credence, conviction (of religious truth, or the truthfulness of God or a religious teacher), especially reliance upon Christ for salvation, constancy in such profession; by extension, the system of religious (Gospel) truth itself, assurance, belief, believe, faith, fidelity."

    One definition of faith is: noun: complete confidence in a person or plan, etc.

    So basically faith means 100% certainty of a thing. If you're fully persuaded that you're going to get your paycheck after working two weeks, you have faith in your job even though it has not happened yet. You have 100% conviction in the ability of your job to come through for you just as they have many times before.

    I think it's important to get the original meaning of a term from the Bible. The Old Testament was written in Hebrew and the New Testament was written in Greek except for when it quotes some of Jesus' words which were in Aramaic and also some Hebrew words or phrases. So since the word "faith" was not used in the Bible at that time, we may lose a lot of the meaning and significance if we toss all that stuff I wrote about "pistis" into the word "faith" of which some people have no idea of the meaning. I love my Strong's Exhaustive Concordance of the Bible. Bible concordances list every word in the Bible in alphabetical and chronological order and tells you where you can find it. And in the back of the concordance it tells you the Hebrew word and meaning of the words in the Old Testament and the Greek word and meaning of the words in the New Testament. You get to see how many times a word and names are used in the Bible.

    So like I was saying earlier, Hebrew 11 is the BEST chapter in the bible about faith. It's quite clear. It's not even hard to read. Here are a few verses that explain what faith really is.

    Hebrews 11:1 - Now faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen.

    Faith is the thing that you're hoping for. Faith is the proof of the things you're hoping for but have not yet seen. Romans 8:24 asks a rhetorical question (a question to make you think with no answer expected). It asks something to effect of, "If you could already see what you have the faith for, then why in the world would there be the need to hope for it? You'd already have it and therefore wouldn't need to hope! And since you're hoping, you do what all hopeful people do. They wait for what they're hoping for!"

    Romans 8:24 - For we are saved by hope: but hope that is seen is not hope: for what a man seeth, why doth he yet hope for? 25 But if we hope for that we see not, then do we with patience wait for it.

    If you are hoping to graduate in December '09, don't you wait until that date? Do you just drop out of college or high school because it hasn't happened yet? What is that to do? What sense is that making? When you're hoping for something (ex. wedding date, graduation date, a fun event), you wait for it. It makes no sense to me that people don't believe that the things they are hoping for are going to happen just because they haven't seen it come to pass yet. That's where the concept of HOPE comes in. Hope is what makes you wait. It's probably the ONLY thing keeping you waiting if you really think about it.

    And one quick question - what sense does it make to have 100% faith that when you die that you're going to heaven or hell if you don't believe anything else the bible says about healing, miracles, people being raised from the dead, supernatural provision, supernatural protection, etc.?

    Hebrews 11 lists a number of people from the Old Testament who lived by faith even though the concept of faith wasn't even used much then. It lists Abel, Enoch, Noah, Abraham, Sara, Isaac, Jacob, Joseph, Moses, Rahab, Gedeon, Barak, Samson, Jephthae, David, and Samuel. And in general, it lists women who received their dead raised to life again and martyrs who had faith. That chapter is packed with people with true faith when the word faith was only listed twice in the OT. And you already know of the many people who had faith in the New Testament that Paul did not list. He didn't even mention the NT peeps -  lady with the issue of blood for 12 years, the people's who children were sick, those who were blind, maimed, lame, dumb, deaf, diseased, virgin Mary, old Elizabeth and Zachariah, the man who was crucified beside Jesus, and MANY more.

    But there is a bad thing that some Christians teach about faith. It's these word-of-faith teachings. They have a lot of truth to them, but they can be very misleading.

    The bible says that faith comes by hearing. So the ONLY people who can get faith are those who get it by hearing. Makes sense enough. And verse 17 of Romans 10 says that faith comes by hearing the WORD OF GOD. So you can't just go around having faith for things that are not God's words. I can't have faith to fly by flapping my arms rapidly and jumping off a building because that faith did not come from God's words. Understand? Verse 14 says you can't call of the Lord to be saved if you have first not believed. And then it mentions the thing about HEARING just like verse 17 does. It says that you can't be saved if you don't hear (which means you can't believe/have faith because the order to get to faith is HEARING then BELIEVING/FAITH). Later comes the ACTION (in this case, it's calling on the name of the Lord to get saved).

    An example is this: Suppose that Wal-Mart is giving out free groceries for an hour. I'll never get to experience those free groceries unless I HEAR from a friend or an advertisement. And even after I hear it, I have to BELIEVE that what my friend or the ad is telling me is the truth and not a lie or a misunderstanding. THEN I have to act accordingly by getting down to Wal-Mart. I can't have faith for things if I never hear or see of their existence. My belief or faith in what my friend is saying to me starts with me hearing her words.

    Likewise, I can't have faith for the many wonderful and exceedingly precious promises of the Bible if I never HEAR about them. And verse 14 continues on to say something to the effect of, "How in the world can you believe in someone you've never heard say anything? And how can you hear without the speaker of God's word?" And verse 15 carries on to say, "And how in the world can someone be God's speaker of God's very own words if God did not send them?" Makes good enough sense.

    Romans 10:13 For whosoever shall call upon the name of the Lord shall be saved.
    14 How then shall they call on him in whom they have not believed? and how shall they believe in him of whom they have not heard? and how shall they hear without a preacher?
    15 And how shall they preach, except they be sent?
    17 So then faith cometh by hearing, and hearing by the word of God.

    I see a lot of people who are "preachers" but who were never "sent of God". They are wolves in sheep's clothing that we have been warned about in the New Testament epistles. We already saw that we can only "legally" (biblically) have faith for things that we hear about from a preacher that is sent of God with God's word. Again, the requirements for biblical faith are:

    1) A preacher
    2) A preacher that is SENT OF GOD
    3) A preacher that speaks the words of God
    4) A preacher that you HEAR
    5) You believing the preacher sent of God who speaks the word of God that you hear

    And I have yet to meet a true preacher that has not told people to read the bible for themselves to hear for themselves truths and promises for them to have faith for. So I don't think that we can ONLY get words for faith from the mouth of a preacher because true preachers themselves will tell you to read the scriptures for yourself. Also, God gives some people direct revelation without going through a preacher. But all these people are bible readers and all these people listen to preachers!

    And then after you have the faith (or the belief, assurance, confidence, persuasion that the Greek word "pistis" speaks of), THEN you have the RIGHT to respond or act accordingly. So an example would be Noah. Only after he heard the word of God and believed Him, THEN he started building the ark. Keep in mind, this was before rain was ever seen! Another popular example is Abraham. Abraham believed 100% in God giving him a child by his wife Sarah. Keep in mind, Sarah had reproductive problems even when she WAS of childbearing age, so of course when she's very old, it's going to be even harder to have faith for that!

    So that shows me that faith or "pistis" means 100% surety and security and confidence in what God has said even when it makes absolutely NO sense in the natural world. It means 100% total belief in what God has said for you to do or feel or believe even when it looks ludicrous and absurd! Even if the WHOLE WORLD deems you psycho. When I tell unbelievers that I believe 100% that I'm going to a paradise when I die for all eternity to live with angels, that I believe that 2,000 years ago a man died for my sins and rose from the dead three days later and is in heaven now interceding for me, that I believe that same man was conceived in his virgin mother's womb without a male's sperm, that I believe that one day that same man is coming back real soon to take me and all the other Christians dead and alive from the earth to give us new bodies and shining white robes, THAT SOUNDS CRAZY TO THEM! And I can see why. But that's only because they don't have faith. I have faith for that. And not just cause Mama and Papa said so. It's because it is the literal word of God. And the bible says that not one jot or tittle of God's word will not be fulfilled. It will ALL come to pass. If it was between either God's words not coming to pass OR the entire earth and heaven passing away, God's words would be chilling and being fulfilled while the earth and heavens passed away!

    Luke 16:17 - And it is easier for heaven and earth to pass, than one tittle of the law to fail.

    Matthew 5:18 - For verily I say unto you, Till heaven and earth pass, one jot or one tittle shall in no wise pass from the law, till all be fulfilled.

    Luke 21:32 - Verily I say unto you, This generation shall not pass away, till all be fulfilled. 33 Heaven and earth shall pass away: but my words shall not pass away.

    The verse below tells us that people without faith cannot please God in any way, shape, form, or fashion. Simply stated, it's impossible. So if it's hard for you to believe that I can believe everything the bible says about a supernatural world (even though it's been confirmed by many, many people in addition to the words of the Bible), then you're not pleasing God. I'm not saying you're not pleasing God because you don't believe the same things I believe in; I'm saying that you're not pleasing God if you don't believe in the words of the preachers that He has sent with His words. And many of these preachers have made the books of the Bible.

    Hebrews 11:6 - But without faith it is impossible to please him: for he that cometh to God must believe that he is, and that he is a rewarder of them that diligently seek him.

    Another VERY important thing about faith is this. Hear me and hear me good! FAITH IS ONLY APPLICABLE TO PEOPLE WHO ARE IN GOD'S COVENANT BECAUSE WE ARE FELLOWHEIRS OR CHILDREN OF GOD. Romans 8:14-17 says that we Christians are sons of God. And since we are sons, we are heirs (meaning we get an inheritance from God our Father). And since we are heirs who are receiving our inheritance from God, then we must also be joint-heirs along with Jesus who is the only begotten son of God.

    Romans 8:14 For as many as are led by the Spirit of God, they are the sons of God.
    15 For ye have not received the spirit of bondage again to fear; but ye have received the Spirit of adoption, whereby we cry, Abba, Father.
    16 The Spirit itself beareth witness with our spirit, that we are the children of God:
    17 And if children, then heirs; heirs of God, and joint-heirs with Christ; if so be that we suffer with him, that we may be also glorified together.

    So with this in mind, we now know that ONLY CHRISTIANS have access to the promises by faith in Christ and God (100% full, total assurance of what the Bible and true, God-sent preachers say about God and Jesus). Here's an example:

    If a man promises that after church he is going to take all his 3 children to Baskin Robbins for ice cream, those 3 kids can rejoice! Not his nephews and nieces, not his second cousins, not all the kids in their Sunday school class. JUST THOSE THREE KIDS OF HIS regardless of if they are biological, foster, adopted, or stepchildren. This promise ONLY applies to his children. And if this dad is a man of his word and nothing comes up to spoil his plans, those three kids are going to get the ice cream he promised them!

    So I don't like it when I hear that preachers make EVERYONE think that they can get the promises of God when the truth is that ONLY GOD'S CHILDREN CAN! It's because we're in a covenant relationship with God. Just like in a marriage, the body of Christ is the bride of Christ. In a human, earthly marriage, if a husband says, "Tonight, I'm going home to have sex with my wife," there is no reason for every wife to rejoice! Only his wife is of the covenant.

    Two definitions of covenant are these:

    noun: (Bible) an agreement between God and his people in which God makes certain promises and requires certain behavior from them in return

    noun: an agreement, usually formal, between two or more persons to do or not do something specified.

    It trips me out when some atheists say things like, "If God's so good, how come He's letting all those people die of starvation and AIDS in other countries?" God is not even in covenant with them! Christians have many fundraisers, charities, donations, and non-profit organizations to help feed and doctor these hurting and suffering people, so they can't say that God is doing NOTHING for them. But the truth is that He has no true obligation to people that are not in His covenant. I think we can all agree that in the Old Testament, God OFTEN AND UTTERLY destroyed MANY of the enemies of His covenant people - the Jewish people. No one back then said, "If your God is so good, how come He lets us go through all this destruction?!" It's because each and every one of them know the answer which was, "It's because you're over their worshipping idols/false gods/demons. So why don't you ask them to help you?"

    My future husband - if that's God's will for my life - will not be under any obligation to every other wife on the globe. He'll only be allowed to have sex with me, to buy me nice and expensive things, to live with me, to have children by me, to be committed to me, etc. That's because he'll be under covenant with me!!!

    So I believe that word-of-faith preachers should make it crystal clear that only God's children have access to these promises. You have to have faith in Jesus. You have to believe 100% what the Bible says about Him. He was born of the virgin Mary in Bethlehem. He was crucified on the cross to take away the sins of those that would believe in Him. He was buried in a tomb. He rose three days later - resurrected from the dead. He's now seated on the right hand of God. He makes intercession for those who believe in Him for salvation. He's coming again soon. That is the truth. That's the Bible. Believe that.

    It makes no sense. But that's where your faith comes in.

Monday, 09 November 2009

  • Even If You Did Reach Perfection, You'd Still Not Be Happy

    Accepting the real (actual) self while reaching for the ideal self.

     

    I have a different way of looking at us perfectionists. We don’t know how to accept our true actual selves as we look to the ideal (perfect) self as a goal.

     

    I like to think of it as a process with a baby becoming an adult. Babies aren’t mean to be just babies. They are all expected to grow up to be functional adults who contribute positively to the society. It’s a tragedy when a person dies young with their whole life ahead of them. People are much more comfortable with a senior citizen dying because they’ve lived a full life. But babies, children, teenagers, and even young adults are seen as the saddest of deaths.

     

    Well babies have to go through their process. No matter how hard they want to be perfect (or adults), it will never happen out of season. Another definition of perfect is “matured”. When fruit is perfect, it has matured or ripened. No matter how hard you want that banana or bunch of grapes to be ripe, it will and can never be rushed. Don’t waste your time; just wait.

     

    We perfectionists, on the other hand, don’t like to wait. We want a utopian society tonight. We want a flawless being today. But we have to understand that it’ll never happen in this lifetime. And perhaps the second we are “perfected” in this earth is the very second we’ll die and go on to glory!

     

    I’ll admit that I can be impatient and dissatisfied with my imperfections. While there are days when I could care less, there are days when I don’t want a strand of hair to be out of place; when I don’t want a pimple or acne scar on my face; when I don’t want a wrinkle in or stain on my clothes; when I don’t want a scar on my body. There are days when I want to be flawless! I know it’ll never happen in this lifetime, but it remains my goal nonetheless.

     

    But God is helping me to realize that I am like a baby. A baby that wants so badly to be matured and lacking nothing. A baby that wants it so bad but yet will NEVER achieve perfection in this lifetime (on this earth). If on a scale of 1 to 10 rating how eager I was for perfection, even if it was 100, it couldn’t happen out of season. Of course, someone  can have flawless skin, flawless hair, flawless clothes for a minute, but it wouldn’t last long. And even if that person did have those things, it wouldn’t make him or her very happy because he or she would dread the day it went away.

     

    I’ve learned (to be honest I am STILL learning) to accept my actual, true, and real self. I’m learning to accept the NOW me. The future me is my GOAL but not yet my reality. The reality is that while I want to be a perfect Christian for God, I still get angry and think bad thoughts about people, I still can be disrespectful towards adults, I still may watch or listen to bad things, I still may do wrong behaviors. But the other reality is that I’m not perfect and never will be. I am a baby who tries to walk like Daddy, but who still stumbles and falls sometimes. I am a baby who tries to eat like Daddy, but who still makes a mess in my high chair. I am a baby who tries to talk like Daddy, but who still can’t get the words out right. I am imperfection waiting for its season of perfect. I am immaturity waiting on my season of maturity.

Friday, 06 November 2009

  • Modest Is The Hottest! Skin Is NOT In!

    BaCk By PoPuLaR DeMaNd!!!

     

    hijab jessica-daisy-dukes

    If you're like how I was, you had a hard time accepting the fact that some churches wanted the women to dress conservatively or modestly. You probably thought, "Why can't the men just pray to God to help them not be so lusty?!" I wondered those same things. I didn't like that they wanted women to have the modesty scarves over their knees when their skirts were too short. I didn't like that they wanted women to cover up their arms with sleeves or shawls. I just didn't understand why people who were saved had to change their style of clothes for others.

    I always figured that since I was not able to have premarital sex and party hardy, it would only be fair that I would get to have this choice over my life. It was like, "I became a Christian and all I got was this lousy t-shirt!" I became a Christian and lost all my old life, and I was not even allowed to dress how I wanted. I'm petite (size 0), so I also figured, "I can wear what I want because I don't have hips or chest. How tempting can I be?"

    But after reading this book called For Young Women Only by Shaunti Feldhahn and Lisa A. Rice, I now realize why. Men are so unlike us. To all the women readers, how much throughout the day would you think about or envision the nice physique of a dude you crush on? Most women will say, "Not much at all or never." Once we see a nice body, most of us immediately forget about it when the stimulus is gone. I don't walk around with visions of muscular male bodies in my head. Men are different. The book said that men will envision women's bodies long after the fact. The book said that they have a storage file in their brains of the nice bodies they have seen throughout their life! They can remember bodies from years ago. Men are very visual unlike us. We're visual too, but not like them.

    I Corinthians 10:23-24 - Everything is permissible—but not everything is beneficial. Everything is permissible—but not everything is constructive. Nobody should seek his own good, but the good of others.

    I learned that just because we CAN do certain things, that doesn't mean we should. Just because I can wear some short shorts, doesn't mean it's what's best. It may be what I want to do when its 97 degrees outside in July in Texas, but I'm not seeking my "good" at the expense of all the men who run into me. I can wear a bra in public if I want to, but it's not beneficial or constructive to those men who will see me and who will lust. In the book that interviewed and surveyed thousands of heterosexual males, one of the boys said that his pastor told a lady in the church to remove a girl who was sitting in the front row who had a skirt on that was too short. This PASTOR was not ashamed to allude to the fact that an UNDERAGED female was very distracting to him. My old church was not very big and had stadium-type seats, so if the women had short skirts and did not have their legs closed or covered with something, the pastor admitted that he could sometimes see their underwear. How embarrassing and shameful is that?! Here is the pastor trying to preach the gospel of God, and he can't concentrate because your underwear are visible to him! One of the most righteous men in the Bible, Job, even had to make a vow with his eyes for them not to look with lust at a female!

    Job 31:1
    "I made a covenant with my eyes not to look lustfully at a girl.

    When we wear tight or revealing clothes, men sometimes automatically envision us naked (and sometimes naked with them). It's instinctual (meaning they are designed to be able to appreciate, admire, and remember a nice body when they see one). Ask most men, and they will probably remember the first naked body they saw in their big brother's porno mag. They remember every woman's body they had sex with. I hear it's usually with nice bodies, but it could go either way. These images come up automatically even when the men DO NOT want them to come up. It's like unwanted pop-up ads. Some men, of course, don't mind these images, but some really do mind because they want to keep their thoughts and hearts pure.

    I think about all the times I wore tight or revealing clothes. I used to wear some of the skimpiest things back in the day. Barely there clothes, see-through clothes, short, short clothes. After reading the book, I started to feel bad when I thought of all the men I tempted unknowingly (but mostly knowingly). I didn't want to cause them to sin, but I did like the attention. The bible says that any man that looks at a woman with lust in his heart is guilty of adultery. Not to be hurtful to anyone, but the book said that these men are usually looking with lust at women with attractive bodies, so if you have a nice body, your tight clothes are without a doubt tempting men. For many black men, they lust for women with shapely bottoms. Some men are breast men. But either way, if you have some type of a decent coke bottle shape that you show off, men with character will struggle not to look and envision you naked.

    Matthew 5:28
    But I tell you that anyone who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery with her in his heart.

    This post is only for Christians because I know that Christian women should not want to tempt our brethren and also because I have used a few bible verses that non-Christians might disagree with. I have some Xanga friendships with women who cover up their bodies in clothes kind of like how the Duggar family dresses. At first, I thought it was unnecessary and legalistic how they dressed. But now I see why they do it. But I also feel that one can be fashionable and trendy while being modest. If you don't have a lot of money to totally upgrade your wardrobe, there are different ways you can "modestify" your current wardrobe. If you have a cute shirt that you really like and don't want to give away but it lifts up and shows your midriff, you can wear a sleeveless undershirt to extend the length to go past the top of your pants. If you have some really cute tight pants you don't want to let go of, you can just wear long shirts over it. If you have a cute tank top or sleeveless shirt you like, you can put a light jacket over it. Believe me when I say that women's arms at time can turn some men on in the wrong way. Compared to some of the pictures I used in this blog, I don't dress nearly as modestly; but I just used them to exaggerate my point so you would definitely get it!

    Proverbs 6:25
    Do not lust in your heart after her beauty or let her captivate you with her eyes,

    I was thinking that this summer, I will probably have to buy some different swimming suits. I have small shape, but it's still kind of nice, so when I go to the beach or pool, I get looks. So I might want to buy some kind of longer shorts to wear and a tankini (sleeveless swimming top that covers the stomach). Summertime is no excuse not to be modest. Men are tempted at the beach just as easily as in the classroom or at the mall (and perhaps even more so). I believe some pervs might go to the beach just to get a cheap thrill (but they won't get it off of me!)

    Some women don't want to tempt men, but they do love the attention they get from dressing in tight or revealing clothes. Sometimes when you don't feel beautiful or attractive on the inside, you will try to get the attention from men to prove it to yourself. Imagine being in a world where you are never called beautiful or where you have never had a secret admirer. I couldn't do it! I'd probably wear more make-up or get my hair done just to get a compliment to make sure of my attractiveness. Well, some women feel similar to that, but they may wear revealing or tight clothes to get the attention and validation. I guarantee that if you have a nice body, you WILL get attention from men. But it won't be the right kind of attention.

    So although you won't find me in a frock down to my ankles and you won't see me with collared shirts and turtlenecks all my life, you will hopefully never see me in a mini-skirt or short shorts. If I lived in a country with all heterosexual women, I wouldn't care what I wore. But because I live in a society full of easily-tempted, automatically-visual, sexual-feeling men, I have to do better.

    This one female teacher showed some high school girls the reason why dress codes were so important in schools. She knows how much women LOVE chocolate. So she had all the boys go to a different classroom. She had her student teacher be in the classroom with all the girls. To the side of the room, she had a huge bag of Hershey's Kisses. She told the girls not to look, not to eat, not to talk about, and not to even THINK about the Hershey's Kisses. She said that if they did, the student teacher would give them sentences to right over and over again. The teacher said that when she returned to the classroom, ALL of the girls had to write sentences. They all raised their hands when the teacher asked if they wanted candy and had a hard time not looking at it.

    I Corinthians 8:9 - But take heed lest by any means this liberty of yours become a stumblingblock to them that are weak.

    Likewise with males. How much more desirable are our bodies than Hershey's Kisses? Most heterosexual men will look, and all will want to look even if they don't look. The book did surveys on men of all ages, backgrounds, and religious preferences. The only men they did not include were men outside of America and men who were homosexual. ALL men wanted to look because of their automatic male tendencies, but the men who had some kind of religion (and not just Christian) wished they didn't want to look. I'm sure most of those girls did not want to write those sentences, but women just love chocolate. Put us in a mall with money to spend, and it would be hard for us not to go buy some shoes! Sex and nice bodies are to men as chocolate and shopping are to women. Women are very tactile (very into touch) like men are very visual.

    Women, if a man touched you on your body or kissed you on your body, how hard would it be for you not to think of sexual things? The same goes for men. When they see a nice body (clothed or naked), it's just as hard for them to say no to sexual images and feelings as it is for the women who are being touched or kissed. As Christian women, we should feel for men because they are constantly bombarded with images that pop-up in their heads in person, in magazines, and on the television. We are all bombarded with in-shape bodies everytime you flip through the TV. Let's not add more images to their collection.

    I really admire that Mormon dude on the new Real World - Brooklyn. He said he had never seen a woman's naked body before and that he wouldn't until marriage. That is so beautiful because after his honeymoon, the only image that will keep replaying in his head -- and sometimes without warning-- will be the body of his wife regardless of how her body looks. That is so beautiful! He'll be less tempted to cheat because all he knows is her and her body. There will be no other women's bodies popping up into his mind at any moment to tempt him and bring back sexual and pleasurable memories. Even if she's not the most experienced in the bedroom, it'll be great because it'll be all he knows.

    So Christian ladies, let's cover up! If you have a nice body, everybody already knows it! You don't have to show it! Give your future husband something to look forward to the night of the wedding. For the single ladies reading this, it helps if you think of yourself as already married. Think of yourself in the future. If God wills that you get married, then you are already married in advance. Dress how you would if you and your husband were out for a walk or if you and your husband were having lunch with his mother and father and little brother and little sister. Dress how you would dress if you knew that other people who wanted to be Christians were using you as their role model. Dress how you would dress if Jesus was sitting on your bed as you picked out your outfit for the day. Buy clothes that you would wear if you and Jesus went to the mall to buy some new clothes. Don't let me judge you; let God and Jesus judge you!

    2007Gowns 055 dress modest2

    ***UPDATE:

    Bikinis Make Men See Women as Objects, Scans Confirm

    Christine Dell'Amore in Chicago
    National Geographic News
    February 16, 2009

    Sexy women in bikinis really do inspire some men to see them as objects, according to a new study of male behavior. Brain scans revealed that when men are shown pictures of scantily clad women, the region of the brain associated with tool use lights up. Men were also more likely to associate images of sexualized women with first-person action verbs such as "I push, I grasp, I handle," said lead researcher Susan Fiske, a psychologist at Princeton University.

    And in a "shocking" finding, Fiske noted, some of the men studied showed no activity in the part of the brain that usually responds when a person ponders another's intentions. This means that these men see women "as sexually inviting, but they are not thinking about their minds," Fiske said. "The lack of activation in this social cognition area is really odd, because it hardly ever happens."

    Dehumanizing

    Fiske and colleagues asked 21 heterosexual male volunteers to first take a test that scores people based on different types of sexist attitudes. The subjects were then shown pictures of both skimpily dressed and fully clothed men and women. Most of the men best remembered headless photographs of women in bikinis, even if they'd only seen the image for two-tenths of a second, Fiske reported this weekend in Chicago during the annual meeting of the American Association for the Advancement of Science.

    And the men who scored higher as "hostile sexists"—those who view women as controlling and invaders of male space—didn't show brain activity that indicates they saw the women in bikinis as humans with thoughts and intentions. Scientists have seen this absence of activation only once before, in a study where people were shown off-putting photographs of homeless people and drug addicts.

    This study has proved me correct in that when women dress provocatively SOME men (not all) see them as tools to some extent. They see women's bodies as something to "push, grasp, and handle" which unfortunately happens when women are dressed a certain way at a party or a club. I'm not saying it makes it right because it's 100% wrong for men to put their hands on a woman's body parts if they are not married to her. But STUDIES that have recorded brain activity show when you dress immodestly, men feel you are inviting them to want to view you sexually. They value your opinion and thoughts just as much as they do a homeless person or a crack addict. I'm not saying that it's women's fault if they are groped or sexually assaulted by men because it's TOTALLY not their fault. But what I am saying is that when you are walking down a dark alley full of thugs, it's not a good idea to safety pin hundred dollar bills onto your blouse just because "thugs shouldn't take things that aren't theirs". YES the men should not steal. Stealing is against the Bible and the law. But guess what? People steal anyway. So just because men shouldn't do things, doesn't mean they won't. Act accordingly.

Thursday, 05 November 2009

Wednesday, 04 November 2009

ISpeakLife

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